Wednesday, October 2, 2019

I Love Whoppers ... I Hate Burger King

This is not the first time I have ranted on this topic -- in a previous post I vowed "no more Burger King." see Brand Enforcement Redux. That was 2015!

So four years later I am craving, you guessed it, a Whopper. What to do but visit a Burger King ... yes I broke my vow. I think I was brain-washed by all those "Impossible Burger " commercials. And no I do not want a fake Whopper.

I visit my local Burger King late in the lunch hour, eye the drive-thru line, remember the "Hiring Now" post on the brand sign, and opt for dine-in. I should have turned around right then. Glancing to my left, I see five hungry working men fixated on the post-checkout service line. Drooling for my Whopper and seeing the hunger in their eyes, I fight against my better instincts and step up to order.

A busy-manager-type takes my order as he negotiates bagging fries, shouting out pick-up orders, and exhorting the staff. Although doubtful, I figure how bad can it be? This is the self-deception one engages in when craving a Whopper. I order a Whopper with cheese, sandwich only, and cup for water. $6.10! I think wow the prices have really gone up since 2015. I look at my receipt to see if they charged me for water. Nope.

A few more unsuspecting customers wander into the service black hole, as me and the five work men await our lunches. And we wait. Of course, under the circumstances, I expect to wait a bit. But after five minutes and, from the looks on the faces of the working men that suggest a collective jump-the-counter-bull-rush, I start timing the wait.

My wait was 18 minutes! And, as I approach the counter with a "what-the-#%&#" look on my face, the manager-type looks at me and the order board and yells to the back "waiting on a DOUBLE WHOPPER WITH CHEESE." I hesitate, look at my receipt, and realize that DBL meant a double! I explain the error, fearful that any comment will cause further delay. Almost simultaneously a double Whopper with cheese lands on my tray and the manger offers a partial refund. With some quick mental gymnastics, a dollar is placed in my hand. At that point I would have taken a dime!

Whew, at least I didn't have to pay for water.

Need I say more Burger King? See you in 2023.